Letter to the St Pete Times

By John "Birdman" Bryant


To: Letters to the editor, St Pete Times

From: Bird feeder and alleged urine-dumper John Bryant

Re: "City adopts rule banning urination on public property", Oct 19

[Note to editor: If this letter is considered too long, just lop off the first paragraph.]

It is apparent from your article that some people on the city commission are Shocked, Shocked to discover that people have excretory functions. Gee, what with the media's daily discussion of anal sex, we are surprised to see the commissioners hyperventilating over something believed to be practiced even by the Pope. Maybe health is their concern, but if so, how can they happily tolerate the daily tidal wave of dog urine that is 'dumped' in the parks, while a cupful attributed to me practically washes them away? They aren't even moved by dogs urinating publicly, altho pouring yellow liquid from a cup is apparently ob-SCENE!

But the urine-dumping business is just an attempt to prejudice people against us and our birds. THE FACTS: (1) According to the experts, pigeons pose no threat, disease-wise or otherwise; (2) Our feeding has ZERO impact on neighborhood property except for some insignificant sidewalk spots; (3) The people opposing us have behaved unethically in NUMEROUS ways; and (4) We've been feeding birds without incident for FIVE YEARS. So why the brouhaha now? Could it be because just ONE MONTH before the fireworks started, we established a website (www.TheBirdman.Org) which criticizes a Certain Powerful Minority? (Recall Franklin Roosevelt's statement that "In politics, nothing happens by accident.") We're helping St Pete by facing down attempted government intrusiveness, but success depends on City residents contacting their Commissioners. For all the gory details of our year-old fight, plus fascinating facts about pigeons and their astonishing benefits, please visit our website.


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